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I Don’t Know What to Say! What Should I Say

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The first time you meet a friend who has recently lost a spouse or other family member, you find it very difficult to know what to say.  Remember that your friend probably feels similarly out of their depth while carrying a heavy load of grief.  Take the initiative and reach out first. 

Start with saying that you are sorry about their loss of a loved one – and say their name.

Relate a happy memory of the person who has recently died.  Sharing these stories helps the grieving move through their struggle to cope with their new life.  Don’t deny the past – it is part of what makes us who we are and our shared history.

Focus on asking how the survivor is coping.  Don’t just say, “Let me know if there is anything I can do for you.”  Give some examples of things you would be prepared to do: Can I take you to the store or out to lunch?  Can I do your ironing?  Would you like me to mow your yard?  “Think about it and let me know”.  Then follow up later by phone to repeat the offer.

If words fail you, a hug can say so much!  Those who are grieving are also missing physical contact.

Reflections of Life Articles: October 2021

Winter 2021 - Hopes Dreams

Hopes, Dreams and Wishes

As children we have our favorite things, our favorite places, and our favorite people. When asked, children will with enthusiasm tell anyone what matters to them. The whole world is open to them and they reach for the stars. As we grow older we continue to aspire for fulfilling the wish lists of our heart. …

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Winter 2021 - Reflections of Love

Reflecting Love Through the Holidays

The first week of November, St. Francis Reflections Lifestage Care kicked off the holiday season with Reflections of Love ceremonies, lighting special oak trees in five cities throughout Brevard including Cocoa, Palm Bay, Rockledge, Titusville and West Melbourne. These trees are a reminder for our community of those we have loved and lost. Each tree …

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Winter 2021 - Rev. Davidson

Never stop giving back

Everything Brevard magazine launched the Heartbeat of Brevard in September and continues the legacy of honoring those who impact the Space Coast with their service. They proudly introduced Reverend Haywood Davidson, a 10-year volunteer with St. Francis Reflections Lifestage Care as their Heartbeat of Brevard for October. Rev. Haywood Davidson, pastor of Greater Mt. Olive …

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Winter 2021 - Veteran William Habberman

Veteran’s Day 2021

Anytime Veterans of different branches get together, there is banter that includes which branch is tougher or which one has it the most comfortable. Sounds of “Ooh Ra!”, “Hooah”, “HUA”, “Hooyah”, “Hoorah” each of which identify their branch can be heard. This Veteran’s Day was no exception to this norm at the Greater Palm Bay …

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Winter 2021 - Beatles

HELP!

Liverpool Live – Beatles Tribute Band “HELP! I need somebody, HELP! Not just anybody HELP!” These words ring in the ears and Concert for a Cause will be Rockin’ the Sunset. This will be the first of many concerts to come that will rock your soul for the good and bring back long lost memories …

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Winter 2021 - On The Island IPU staff

Uplifting Lives on Island

No man is an island,No man stands alone,Each man’s joy is joy to me,Each man’s grief is my own. ~Joan Baez Brevard County is 72 miles long with islands and beaches galore. For the first time St. Francis Reflections will cross the causeway and provide a care center for patients on Merritt Island. This new …

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